How Many Times Can the Broken Pieces Be Picked Up – and Who Will You Give Them To?

Posted on April 14, 2022 by Harry Brake

It is at the very weakest moments of our lives, that we often see the truest parts of our own self. It is difficult to say why this is the case, but as for myself, it has been often the truest of the truths I have discovered.

In receiving the devastating news that a mentor and one of the truest hearts I have ever met lost her brave and courageous battle with cancer this evening, I asked myself silently a few times, why on this sometimes biting, knashing, seemingly ungrateful earth do some of the best, purest people, some of the hardest fighting, working, and most selfless people have to suffer such great length, where so many others that are selfish, ungrateful, bullying, individuals remain untouched by struggle? Why on earth indeed?

I am sure many of you have asked this question in some of the most trying, frustrating, exhausting, and bottom of the bottom of times. It is in these moments of utter desperation, that the truest form of who we are and can be is often revealed, and I always have believed that is from the strength of the very people we mourn, but have given us the strength to represent them forever in our actions, our loves, and their lives and just in another form. Through each of us.

Ms Cheryl as many of you know was one of the purest heroes I have ever met on this earth. Coming back from Mexico City, broken-hearted about leaving such a close-knit family of people that had taken a chance on me, never knowing me and taking me in. Losing the one person that had hired me when I originally was not the right person they were looking for, Mr. Williams in hiring me changed the trajectory of my whole life. Little did he know at the time, his decision put some of the most amazing young people, some of the most amazing teachers, artists, and dear friend in my life that to this day, I am sure I never deserved.

Leaving this all behind was bittersweet, and coming back to my family, and working through several losses on top of losing Mr. Willians, upon moving back, often pushed me to the ground to a crawl more times than I care to recall. Yet, ms Cheryl took me in at perhaps one of my lowest moments, and she gave me so many freedoms to work with students and young people, it gave me more than a running start returning to the United States in such a blur of not knowing who I was amid the changes or where I was going. She gave me a map.

Through the countless issues, problems, and dilemmas that Ms Cheryl guided young people through, listened to, and found ways to support them and give them confidence, she never wavered from her calm, reflective demeanor, ever. She always placed the clouds of hope under every single young person, adult, and friend she came into contact with. She passed its legacy onto every single person that came to know her, and when she retired many were devastated in seeing her move away from a scene she always managed to play the hero in.

Who would save everyone now? The greatest legacy and gift that Ms. Cheryl provided to everyone within her reach was the love, the listening ear, the calm demeanor, the will to work until you thought you had nothing left, and then you realize you have a whole lot more because there are so many others that have 20 times worse problems than yourself. In fact, the very complaints you think you had are mere specks of dust when it came to trying to find ways to help those around us that were suffering way more than we would ever come to realize.

Ms. Cherly, for me, took a chance on me, that she could have easily said, you have so much going on right now, you just moved back, I am not sure you are going to be able to give what we need for this Upward Bound program. She never doubted me. She jumped in and advocated for my abilities, talents, and interests from day one as if she had known me all her life. I can tell you from the heart, apart from my family and the amazing friends I have been lucky to have as a part of my life, there is also a whole ton of people on the opposite side of that spectrum that will never advocate except for themselves, period. Ms Cheryl’s love for all things possible, even in the middle of the worst of storms, is LEGENDARY. As is Ms Cheryl.

I would guess, leaning more to positive belief, there are so many of us in the world touched by Ms Cheryl, touched by Mr Williams, touched by someone that believed in us for no reason, advocated for us, and set us on our way to doing things we never knew we could do. The very worst thing we could do is hide from those opportunities to keep these amazing individuals alive through a withdrawing grief. I grief that says I can no longer pick up the pieces.

I am of the belief that just when we think there are no more broken pieces, another storm of pieces will be at our feet, trying to wear us down. However, the lives of such people as Mr Williams, Ms Cheryl, who give you a part of themselves because they believe in you, and they believe you can go on to help someone else and believe in them like they did you? That is the largest piece of all to pick up and hold onto – the very biggest piece. You are so missed already Ms. Cheryl but your life has just begun thanks to the many throngs of people your life affected. Thank you so very much.

I love 4:03 of this video – that was the very epitome of who Ms. Cheryl is!

I think it is a powerful statement that both Mr Williams and Ms Cheryl both wanted us to spend more time helping others than knowing and worrying about them- which defines them perfectly in all they ever did.

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One Single Day, Task, Focus is a Losing Librarisition…

Posted on April 6, 2022 by Harry Brake

Librarisition? Seriously? Bear with me.

The below comment given by a librarian in another state hit home with me. I have been employed where certified librarians were made to feel as if they were a mascot. Luckily, I am in a school, and previously was in a school, that does/did not view it that way, a priceless gift, but many are.

Okay so yes, whether you realized it or not, April 4th was National School Librarian Day, and yes, three amazing faculty members of my school reminded me and told me thanks.

That felt good.

BUT – to the amazing and talented certified school librarian who wrote this above- I feel you, I truly do but KNOW THIS -Our professional ALWAYS ALWAYS is usually deemed less than the roles of nurses and counselors which are required to be in schools, and of course be certified. To the dismay of certified librarianship NOT so much BUT….

…We know what we do every single day is just as valuable as any profession, knowing we pave the way forward for futures. Many take that for granted, deny deny deny, or choose to ignore that fact.

BUT get this, the things we do EVERY SINGLE DAY, not just ONE day, (or month) speak louder than the multiple days spent removing certified school librarians from schools.

Organizations believe in us.

Students, senators, and state representatives and teachers and yes, admin believe in us.

Students and faculty believe in us – look at a typical day!

It is vital to remember, the administrators that do not acknowledge the value and merit of a certified librarian, the parents who choose to ignore literacy is a factor to all success, the individuals who choose to take the path of a degree in Information Science is not needed – they continue to struggle to find ways to succeed, and we all know, the best-kept secret and not best-kept secret but those to know, one of the very important cogs in the educational system is a certified librarian in every school.

It is so easy to believe a certified librarian alone is the key, teachers, administrators, and certified librarians with paraprofessionals change the landscape of education forever. It has been proven time and time again. Once others begin to take blindfolds off, more successes will be heard and seen.

Together, we all realize, it does not come down to one day, even one month, but the collective and countless hours, patience, and behind-the-scenes work we do EVRY SINGLE DAY? The privileged individuals who WANT to know, know more. It always seems to work out that way and togetgherm we work better.

Last note to let you know you are not alone – I did a Component Five experiment with students, on what they knew about certified school librarians and then what they did know after receiving a little information about certified librarians being present in our schools in Delaware. You are going to be amazed at the results, but it settles well with me that students are the first to be enlightened about the status, value, and presence of certified librarians in Delaware. Many times I was asked, “Why did I NOT know this about the profession, the lack of certified librarians, their absence across this state, and why do not more people outside of school know this?” All good questions. I do believe National School Librarian Day and National School Library Month, single, powerful tools, are meant to answer those questions.

Keep the faith. All bets on one single day is a losing Libraristion. 🙂

P.S. We have another day / opportunity too- April 16th – National Librarian Day 🙂

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Intersection. Which Way Do you Turn?

Posted on April 2, 2022 by Harry Brake

April 1st.

Poetry Introduction (because School Libraries, Sexual Assualt Awareness and Prevention, and Poetry can be destinations we use vehicles to get to!)

Whew. Let’s just dive in. Looking back to last year – it seemed a different April 1st is appearing, and one not to be worried about if headed in the right “direction.” (That is the good and bad thing about school librarians (SCHOOL LIBRARY MONTH!) – See? their mind is ALWAYS on and connects to everything…) It seems the idea of idling at an intersection was more real this year than ever, seeing so many aspects converging together. Exciting.

Speaking of that term before we just do that, this day ironically marks the birthday of my Day, Harry Brake Sr., and an assortment of gifts he has left behind for our family to capitalize on. From his hard-working ethic, to his mischievous nature, to the ability to reach out and pull in a handful of acquaintances without blinking – (pretty much like a magnetic), to an unbridled creativity that would come out in the most unexpected ways (wood carving, soap carving, mechanically, twisting designs throughout metal, paint, and more, the armory of talent that he carried, utilized, and shared knew no bounds.

Oddly enough, there were similar identities, even stories. but as a family, we know there was only one that carried weight in so many widening circles in Pennsylvania.

Much of that I carried with me silently throughout the day and helped me create and reflect on the below as well- as I realize each of us carries a potential – the trick is seeing it through to share it and have it develop into other creations and motivating others.

April 1st- April Fool’s Day, aaaah yes. So – it is true, I did NOT add an addition to my canine and feline family despite my post. Sorry about that. I try to keep the lines between what is possible and what is not closely aligned to allow a little bit of questioning to occur on April Fool’s Day in the tradition of the mischievousness my Dad would always lay before us. However, the intersection of the day is what is powerful amid a day of potential foolery.

The whole idea behind School Library WEEK, (April 3-9, 2022) and of course, School Library Month Month, is to be a model and beacon to inform others of what they might not realize about school libraries. It sounds obvious, that school libraries have morphed since the idea of a room full of books at your disposal without spending a fortune, and free to the average patron – ALWAYS a bonus to anyone that really likes anything mechanical, vocational, creative, inspiring, and a hundred more topics, without having to be a book worm. Unless people outside of libraries realize the inside can be a haven for dreams, talents, creativity, inspiration, and connections, yes, connecting to everything around us, then the value of the school library is diminished, just like a vehicle loses its value as soon as it is driven off the lot.

How do you maintain that value and keep that knowledge in front of the average person outside of the school library? At this point in the intersection of school libraries and potential, it is all about finding ways to market what exactly a school library does, and meet those needs of the community, be it a school community, a town/neighbor community, a learning community, a retired community, an business community, an agricultural community, every one one of these communities are connected and have intersection they all will eventually meet at, the key is to have the school library be the stoplight, sign, or traffic director to send people in the right direction.

Our first intersection decision becomes National Poetry Month in April! First, get this straight, Poetry is not always flowery, sweet, and sentimental. FALSE! It CAN be, but more importantly, poetry helps show the relatedness of thought, to action, to sometimes emotion, to the world around us. Of course the classics stick out, like Robert Frost, Walt Whitman, Emily Dickinson, Billy Collins, the “classics” that will burn through your memory of what driving through an intersection is.

Let’s also recognize that poetry is and can be represented by “Hot Rods” of the category, Amanda Gorman, Maya Angelou, Violeta Orozco, Joy Harjo, Jason Reynolds, Sandra Beasley, many more young poets, and this comparison to intersections about poetry and vehicles is not by accident.

There is poetry about mechanics.

There is poetry about farming.

There is poetry about pets.

There is poetry about doctors.

There is poetry that can highlight causes such as Sexual Assault Awareness and Prevention Month (Also April).- Survivor Poems that show growth through traumatic events

The intersection we find ourselves at with School Library Month and poetry is full of potential, it is just dependent on which direction we choose. So here is a challenge to start us off. We are looking for poems that discuss growth, life, and even more how they represent our own state of Delaware, or your state, or country where you live, your immediate community. We want to collect these that reach deep and make you think in a literary art magazine by students, called The Riff.

We want to theme our collection Sprout, and show how people from all over respond and see this idea of “sprouting” through many dimensions of growth. We want to publish this and show this is a collection of individuals who are able to show us through your poetry (this month IS poetry Month). We hope you will send them here: SUBMIT and please tell others and let’s show how this intersection of poetry and life are navigated by us. Please also check out our Poetry a Day, every day page, as we navigate through so many types of Poetry for EVERY DAY! –

Next post, since this is just becoming too long 🙂 – How the intersection of poetry contests out of Woodbridge High School, Escape Rooms, and some other cool contests this month will engage and challenge everyone from adults to young students, stay tuned later today to learn how this will be available to you – and celebrate School Library MONTH!

Also, Happy Belated April Fool’s Day Birthday Dad!

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Jasmine Warga, Students, and Art bring out the inner student

Posted on March 30, 2022 by Harry Brake

Olivia, do you think you could paint a conversation between an author and students/adults?

Wow She did!

In talking with Jasmine Warga and her book, Other Words for Home, so much depth!

A HUGE shout out to Delaware’s Festival of Words, which involves coaches, artists, teachers, parents, students, librarians, athletes, readers and non-readers to name a few. We need to continue to support initiatives like that that allow students to think outside of the proverbial box. This event supplies opportunities, meals, and texts alongside live author events to inspire all.

The talk we had tonight with Jasmine Warga, AMAZING.  The concept and perception of women wearing hijabs, the level of comfortable being asked where you are from when you were/are born in the U.S., the stereotypes and fears that many Arab Americans had following 911, and so many more topics that were brought up!   AND we had a student paint this painting based on the conversations she hears – attached.  Amazing night and I realized, school libraries can catch students off guard and enable a sense of trust to talk about normally uncomfortable topics when students find that third space library that introduces art and interests of the students without ever having to mention a book. 

The interest in books actually does not need to come from a reading interest which many students do not have, students tonight became interested because of topics they might learn about themselves, that draws them to the books. 

Fascinating discoveries tonight!

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A Day in the Life!

Posted on March 23, 2022 by Harry Brake

It was an honor to be asked to write free-lance school library stories for Every Library, and the first one was difficult to get exactly right, – it took me several runs at it to get the idea across of how the position of a school library is recognized for what it is – too many roles to checklist off.

Check it out and let me know what you think!

View at Medium.com
A Day in the Life!

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Perfect Day?

Posted on March 6, 2022 by Harry Brake

Sometimes you just hit the lottery.

Arriving at Chapel Branch at 1:00PM, on a day that seemed patterned after the best summer day you can recall – Denise Oliver and I began walking our canines, and it was picture perfect. The dogs seemed to say with each whiff, FINALLY! Between the breeze and gentle rocking of air you could hear through the woods, it is an AMAZING place to be on a day like today.

Looking back over the last few weeks with developments on the horizon, it is such an amazing gift to be able to have a place like Chapel Branch to escape the marathon’s of to do’s the world recycles day after day.

A VERY successful DO More 24 campaign,

a great community cleanup planned for March 26th at Chapel Branch and Newton Woods, our exciting Pre Easter online auction April 11th – 15th, of so many artistic and creative items that will make amazing Easter gifts from businesses all over MD and DE, our Beer and Benevolence Community Dinner night at Dog Fish Head April 27th starting at 5:00 PM – and the possibilities that are on the horizon, but add this all up and realize most events are within a 1-4 miles if you live in Seaford- it is breath taking.

After an amazing day and soaking in sunshine, we saw at least 10 more cars in the parking lot, talking with new visitor about the trails, and engaged in an amazing conversation with someone that remembered when Chapel Branch was initiated along with the Seaford Swim Associations’ pool, it was a perfect day to travel back in time. It was interesting to hear about the swing sets, baseball park, and how Chapel Branch was created to be a recreational area for those that became employees of DuPont. I have been searching for years for images/pictures that captured what these areas looked like, if you happen to know of anyone that has these. We’d love to gather these for an archive adding to the legacy of the Chapel Branch area.

With a day like this, the dogs rest and sleep better, we sleep a sounder sleep, and are able to face a next day where we realize it is better to slow down and take on the tasks of every day at a slower pace to take in the beauty we often rush by every day. It was exciting to also meet individuals today who wanted a copy of our recently donated book, Last Child in the Woods, and discuss the many wonders of Chapel Branch they may not be yet aware of.

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Anger, Guilt, Faults

Posted on February 28, 2022 by Harry Brake

Not sure if you have felt anything as of late, but I know – Anger, so much anger has been welling up inside of me and it is actually interesting looking back.

Most of my anger is directed towards the events of how people that take so much pride in their country, they are willing to fight for their Ukranian country at all costs – willing to drop everything and how much it touches them despite the losses and numbers against them – I am watching some of the bravest individuals in front of me.

I am a visual person, and I feel it is way too easy to placate what is happening by simply reading the lines, seeing the images of their pain, and fear, I can at least transport a part of myself to their plight and try to dig in and follow and pray for their bravery and success in the face of such tyranny.

I am not sure, well I am sure it is not on the level of when I thought I knew so much about countries from the studies I had from textbooks in high school and college, My biggest flaw was I believed everything I read and that was taught to me and did not question enough. When I travelled to Mexico carrying the views, beliefs, and stereotypes of what I thought was Mexico – I realized within a few days how off base I was. Seeing children that were one to two years old in the metro willing to sell stickers that would not fit in the space of a wrinkle in your knuckle, for hours just to get a few bits of change, until the wee hours of 3 and 4 AM, seeing how hard individuals worked day and night having the most minimal resources they could call home, and feeling the pain, suffering, and struggle yet immense gratitude for what they had without ever wanting more, more more, I felt so privileged to be able to truly take in the idea that less is more, the most important assets you carry with you are the relationships, trusts, and ability to help others – the “stuff” we acquire means nothing unless it helps others feel at ease, rather than just the pride of having things.

I could go on and on about how disgraceful some of my views were, and how grateful I was to be welcomed with open arms, set straight, and to truly view how amazingly smart, trustworthy, and reliable my neighbors and friends were when they had no reason to be amid a backdrop of views representing alot of slander, false portrayals and ignorant comments that often came from others about Mexico and life in general in Mexico in this particular case when I created a life there. (Thanks to those that took me in no questions asked).

Mexico was the most beautiful country thanks to the beliefs and values that so many generous individuals would not let those aspects get in the way of seeing me for how I, was, and how I could embrace Mexico as a country and realize how lucky I was to be a part of the country. I never take for granted that experience and the country made up of individuals that would bend over backwards for me and never know the whole me at first.

I transfer alot of this experience to wanting and expecting more from the world to support Ukraine, my anger comes in pockets from these areas – politicians who think they know what is happening in other countries without ever spending their time there to know the country and know the people.- that disgusts me. It hits me deep and causes so much anger in me when I see so many selfish people around me interested in things, things things, and often tend to go blind when it comes to noticing the people around them that need a ear, a conversation, solace and yet anything that matters to many are things things things. I am surprised at night when I have gone to sleep crying over hearing the plight and impact of what is happening in Ukraine, I can envision the students and friends I know in Ukraine and yes am worried sick, and with every complaint from people around me about having to do some type of task, or complaining about not having the latest this or that – my biggest fault is applying the open mind and heart of a people to my own country, as many did for me – one of many of my faults.

Guilt comes from me not being a better person for having such a short fuse when I see this occurring on all levels, disrespect for other countries, disrespect for other peoples, for their beliefs, blaming others for something instead of doing something to make it better, I need to find a way.

As a country, I find myself thinking the harder I work and the harder I put myself into something, it does alleviate me from being so lax about things and I feel I just have a sort of repentance owed for something being too selfish about how thankful I should be for the gifts I have received of a job, friends, good health, safety, and more. I take way to much for granted, way too much, and it is ironic I feel and see this when other people are put down, threatened, forced against the freedoms they should be afforded and are not given any opportunity to truly live. The anger boils under my level of realization that I wish more people would put themselves in situations to understand from the outside of their situation what the situation truly feel likes, not just from their point of view.

I write this as I try to find ways to better the world around me, find others that feel the same way, and try to form an alliance to put out fires of selfishness, greed, ignorance, and more. Some days are better than others, others worse the the day before – yet, the worse realization I find is the thought of not trying to value every little piece of gratitude that I am lucky to have that can’t be bought, can’t be charged, can’t be collected. I think these thoughts as every day I pray for a strength, a courage, and a power so vast that the powers that try to overrun countries, attitudes that try to tear down and out down others – find futile against the kind hearts that truly make the world a better place. Helpless in seeing others fight for what is right has been difficult.

I hope I continue to find those people who find ways to care with their hearts rather than their wallets, greed, and selfishness. It is painful to see so many of these emotions brought out in the affront against Ukraine, and I stay positioned to want to push their strength, energy, and pride even against everything that threaten it. I have learned this from some of the best people in and out of the United States, and that gift is priceless.

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Everyone Deserves Their Third Space

Posted on February 26, 2022 by Harry Brake

One of three students that had breakdowns this week, and they found refuge in the safe “third space”, the school library. Parents and teachers need to readvocate for certified librarians and school libraries that do way more than simply check out books. That stereotype is an insult to students and faculty that the school library can support. A great email from one of the young ladies this third space available to them helped. It is not ever about ME, it is always about what the school library can provide for students.

“Hey Mr. Brake thank you for checking on me and I like how you tease me it makes my day feel so much better and put a smile on my face you are my favorite teacher at this school and I feel like the library with you is my safe place there. I’m sorry if I been kinda been in there a lot I just have things going on and I feel most safe in the library with you cause you make me laugh and smile and brighten my day. I had a talk with my mom tonight and we talk about something we never did talk about and I’m pretty shaken on it cause now she confirmed what I thought I remember from my past. So I’m now taking all that in and it’s just a lot for me to process everything going on. So thank you for being patient with me and giving me a safe place. I really do appreciate you in my life.”

if you do not know the status or presence your school library or school librarian has, I urge you to be more inquisitive and more more vocal – and you will see positive things happening that you would not believe, stemming from a school library!

The library as “Third Space” in Your School

Third Space

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The Only Place for Internment is for Our Ugly Past

Posted on February 20, 2022 by Harry Brake

Most of yo are familiar with the actor named George Takei from the character as Sulu in Star Trek, and certainly a closer look at his life matches the star Trek them – “To boldly go where no man has gone before” – and it is easy to see George Takei did do that.

“They Called Us Enemy” was one of the most striking graphic novels I had ever picked up – and seeing George Takei revisit Japanese internment and a past that many would never want to have repeated, his ability to take us there was remarkable.

Even more remarkable is the open-minded, optimist views that George Takei has on humankind, all humans, all of mankind, from all backgrounds, all races, all manner of origin. ‘Lost Freedom’ is only one example of this remarkable reaction to the past.

To hear this podcast and realize, reparations are a small, tiny aspect of bringing respect to major missteps of our history’s past, and where we all can improve going into the future – is also remarkable. From television, to Broadway, to congress, to classical music, to publishing, to podcasts – anyone, anywhere can find a position to achieve and use that very position to inform and better our world. If someone that has been hurt and can rise using their position to reach across to all individuals from all races and forgive, move past mad-made institutions that often divide people into political camps and placed them in internment camps, and do so much to bring people together and unite them, such as George Takei, can’t you and I?

https://soundcloud.com/all-classical-portland/john-pitman-review-kenji-bunch-george-takei-lost-freedom

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When Coincidence is Not Quite Enough

Posted on February 14, 2022 by Harry Brake

“You can blow out a candle But you can’t blow out a fire.   Once the flames begin to catch.    The wind will blow it higher“ —  Peter Gabriel.

When I left for Pennsylvania to be with my family, I remembered I had a long drive ahead, and now that I had a working cd player, randomly grabbed three on the way, not really putting much thought into the three – and well here I was. Riding back home on the PA Turnpike, Peter Gabriel’s album, Shaking the Tree: Sixteen Golden Greats, stuck on that line above, memorializing a GREAT man – Steven Biko – and thinking, how much this line, could be applied to so much that has happened in our lives – thinking this and much about leaving Pittsburgh behind me as I left all behind for Delaware.

Funny thing is, in the past – I never truly seemed to find the right time and moment to appreciate how much growing up in PA, as well as the strength that the city of Pittsburgh contains. I realized that the strength, awe, and love I had for Pittsburgh and surrounding areas I grew up in came from the strength of my family. The loss of my spirited, soulful niece Jackie hit me like a ton of dynamite, and had done so even more at her service Saturday. Obviously it had hit my family that had supported Jackie in the last few months, days, and weeks even harder.

My niece, Jackie Barnes, was the exact image of her father, my brother, Harry Randall Brake, and it was an understatement of how proud I am to hold the same name as my brother and father, and for sure, I always tried to have my name live up to the quote written at the beginning of this post in memory of my father, my brother, and the unspoken acts they had taken on in helping others. Stubborn, determined, tough as nails, Jackie certainly had followed in the steps of her father, and Randy’s father, as well as my sister Lisa, and family members we have lost and come together as a family over.

I remember taking in the parts of Tarentum, New Kensington, Natrona Heights, Pittsburgh I had not see, the bridges, the alleys, the plants, the breathtaking views of the rivers, all of it. It all took in new meaning this time around as the impact of having such a tough family that has weathered tougher times, it all would mean little and have less impact had it not been for the family I had been raised in.

As we were sitting down eating together following Jackie’s service, while we were taking in the soulful message of Dru’s tribute to Jackie, breaking down Jackie to a “T”, hearing Forever Young and The Band Perry delve down and bring back Jackie’s life in so many ways and place her in front of us one more time, it was all alot to take in. I did not expect for the losses of my cousin Trenton, father, Harry, brother Harry, my sister Lisa, it all came back in waves of how many losses have come in such a short time and yet…

…as I looked from brother to brother, sister, to niece, nephew, and more- our whole family, it is unmistakable to see the faces of my Dad, niece, nephew, cousin in our family. The determined success and hard work that my sisters, brothers, nephews, nieces, had put in and had made their lives be that flame Peter Gabriel referred to, they had done it and then some.

It always seemed to me, the gift we never saw coming was the ability to have the hearts of our family live on in each other,from being passed the talents to represent their lives, their names in everything we did in our own lives. It is so incredibly easy to do nothing, lament, walk in sorrow and not carry on, especially when grief at times can be so overwhelming. Yet, when we do find the strength from our family to do so, the lives of our family who are not physically here among us, seems to reside in our lives even stronger in our hearts if we left them. That had always been the hope I had to honor their lives through my own, through our own.

It is odd that sometimes through the losses we have, we come to realize the strengths we have come to overlook. Driving errands on Sunday, and hearing Forever Young specifically come on the radio, NEVER hearing this usually and now the timing being the exact time I did not expect it, it made me pause right in the middle of the road. Sometimes, when someone is so on your mind, I think you can discount coincidence, and I did that on this particular occasion. I ran through my checklist of thoughts mentioned above again, and amid so much loss, celebrated the family I had come out of, and it was easy to see, how much I am bias in being angry at the losses that impacted our family as of late. If I wasn’t bias, I’d have a hard time tying it to my family, not wanting my family to receive those losses – and at the same time, I was continuing to be at a loss, for the losses of students, colleagues, other family’s and the losses they were experiencing of late.

At times, the sense of loss impacts me when I would wake up in the AM, have a knowing list of “to-do’s” and not get to any except one, a victim of losses it seemed. It was difficult to realize at one time how fast a day can slip by your reach without grasping on to the to-do’s you hoped to catch.

Among all of the despair that many of use have had to work through lately, I realized the seemingly coincidence of a song that I had not heard for years reappearing again within days, the chance of a particular line of a song in a cd that I had not picked up for years rang true all of a sudden now, the revisitation among family at not the best of reasons or times, still reinforced the strength of family and friends in times that truly weaken your body. It is in times like these, more than any other, the very individuals we have lost and miss the most, live through us based on the will we have to let their heart, soul, and dreams continue to live through each of us. I have bene lucky to have a family and friends surround me that allow me to continue to do that every single day, through the worst of times and the very best of times.

That seems to have been the best gift ever passed on to me, that I realize more and more every single year. If I pay close enough attention, as I am celebrating the lives and what they have given to the world, I find threads of my own friends and family, that have done the same in ways many might never know, but that our families do.

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